Things take a turn for the worse

Just as I was gettin inspired enough to start writing something goes wrong. Our oldest dog Tasha who we got when we first moved into the house we live in now, is in so much pain she can't walk. There isn't we can do but put her out of her pain and put her down. We got first got Tasha right after we moved. My parents surprised us with her. I remember it like it was yesterday. It was such a nice surprise. We had bought the house because it had a huge backyard, big enough for a Akita. Our last Akita/German shepherd mix had died suddenly we waited a long time to get Tasha and she was a great dog.

The part that hurts most is she wont be making it to her birthday on the 22nd. Her tenth birthday. We all loved her so much. My brother was bonded with her to the point she slept on his bed even through she's huge. It's makes me so sad that once her health started to fail (We're sure she has cancer because of the bumps all over her body.) he started to pull away from her. He doesn't know yet about her being put down tomorrow. I think that breaks my heart more because I remember how I felt when I lost my cat Homer. It's a horrible feeling that never goes away. I still mourn for my cat every time I see his picture. He was my best friend and died during a very hard time in my life.

Our other dog Carmen is going to be so heartbroken. I just don't know how to feel right now. Numbness has over taken me. I'm going to miss our big beast so much. My best memory is of her playing "soccer" with me when she was young. And when she would lie on the couch next to me. How she knows what "Inside voice" means and how she always demanded to get a little taste of what was for diner.

The next few weeks will be hard.